The day after

Dear Sean,

The night of the day you seeped through my flesh, I went home with tears in my eyes. Your scent still lingered on my skin. I still felt your touch on every corner of my body. I gave my mom a false story of were I had been. I lied about my friends wellbeing and laughed it off. I went to the washroom and sat there. You were still there. Your warmth was still in my body. I was in soo much pain Sean. I did not take a shower, it would not hide the fact that I was dirty.

I stared at my phone for your text back which you did not. I watched the videos we took together that day, you seemed so in love Sean. Maybe I'm a fool? I had it coming, I defended you with my life Sean. I just hoped that you were misunderstood and what people said about you was false. On this very day you proved me wrong. It all happened so fast, the music , your arms. It haunts me Sean.

The whole night I kept shutting my eyes and seeing us. The silent wailing, the begging for you to unhand me. I should have stayed home huh.

Tell me what did I do wrong? If giving you my body, made you love me more, I'd do it again Sean. Was it really rape Sean? I will rest my case here.

XOXO,

Ashley <3